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Nothing else existed unless I wanted it to. My family, my own children and husband… they were all completely secondary to my online love. But still, I met their needs too. I gave my job all my attention and love, I gave my family all my attention and love, and I gave my love everything of myself that I had to give. I held nothing back. Oh yes, I went through a difficult time. Having to accept that we’d never be able to meet, was so hard for me. But I got past it. I accepted it. It seems though, that he couldn’t. He couldn’t deal with the ‘other’ woman in his life. His cyber mistress. Me. He couldn’t deal with the guilt he felt when he was with his pregnant wife. Oh, I haven’t mentioned he was married? Yes, I knew that much when we began chatting. But I didn’t realise she was pregnant. I didn’t realise that he was looking for some kind of sexual release because his wife wouldn’t, or couldn’t, accommodate his needs. I just didn’t know. I’d found the unconditional love I was looking. I did not want my boss to think that I was trying to incur favor with him illicitly. I wanted my job security to be due to hard work. As the youngest member of his group, and the most recently hired with no experience at all but a college degree, I felt the need to prove myself. Finally, he was married. Consequently, when an important project was behind schedule, I volunteered to work late one evening to complete it. I called my wife, and explained the situation to her. She understood, but I knew what the urgency in her voice meant. I finished the project sooner than I expected, and drove home. When I got there I was surprised to discover my boss’ car parked in front of our house. When I got inside it was obvious what was happening in our bed room. My boss had used my diligence at work as an opportunity to seduce my wife. At the age of twenty-five my wife was having sex with her second man. I was unsure of how to respond. I had every right to play the role of.
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